“new year, new me”, sounds kinda cliche, right? Well, for me, it’s definitely not a ‘new me’ but maybe discovering a ‘new aspect of myself’? What do you think?
New year is something that fills us with lots of enthusiasm and expectations for the upcoming twelve months. I know nothing much changes after 31st of December, except for the dates of course, but when I think about it, it comes to me as new year is giving us a new chance. New opportunities to fill in the regrets of the last year and to become a better person which my past selves can be proud of.
Now I’m that person in the room who is never certain about her future. In less than 2 years I’m gonna graduate with a bachelor’s degree and I’m still not sure about what I want to do in future. Well, now that’s a big story for some other day of 2024. What I mean to say right now is that there are people who are already planning or have planned what are they going to do in this new year, setting goals for themselves and stuff, and it’s actually really impressive. There’s this guy in my class who had made a vision board at the beginning of 2023 with around 20 goals and he really accomplished more than half of them. I was literally stunned.
Now making new year resolutions is not my cup of tea, I’ve accepted this truth in my 18 years of life. I’m not great with planning and stuff. Like I start doing random stuff and get obsessed with it for a while and then after some time it becomes impossible to manage time for those new hobbies.
For example, I started learning guitar around last August, even uploaded a few covers, and just after it felt like I was actually doing well at it I was stormed with other priorities and the guitar enthusiast inside me faded away. Same happened with my hobby of sketching and wish of learning coding. So in a sense I feel like if I can’t be consistent with these hobbies that I love with my whole heart, how can I accomplish my new year goals. And not to mention, the disappointment that comes at the end of the year is another thing to be afraid of.
But really does that mean I should just give up trying to do new things? Well, the idea sucks actually. It’s an ‘absolutely not’ thing. Maybe, rather than making a resolution like I’m gonna master guitar and sketching this year, I can make a promise to myself that I’m not going to give up any of my hobbies this year. And I will try harder to keep up doing things that bring comfort to my heart.
And about doing something new, from Instagram I got this amazing idea of writing, at least once a week, small notes to self with words of affirmation and advice, and collecting them in a jar/box to finally read them at the end of the year. I’ve already written my first note and I think it’s going to be quite wholesome when I’ll read them.
There’s one more thing I want to try this year and see if it’s really worth it. You see, 2023, for me, it was like a year where life seemed to be testing me with new questions at every other step. I used to think it to be very unlike me, when I found myself thinking deeply about stuff that don’t really have much to do with my life, but still somehow all of those thoughts matter to me and they have value. I found answers to some, yet my mind was filled with noises, for there were even harder questions now.
Growing up is scary. Sometimes I feel like I’m willingly getting myself in problems because I just want answers. But I can’t help this curiosity, can I? So I’m going to write a letter to my future self, telling 19 years old Poorwa all the worries I have now and just asking if 2024 was able to gave her answers to my questions.
At the end of the year, (I hope I don’t forget this) I will write a reply to my letter. I don’t know how will it go but I already feel so excited about it.
How’s been your 2024 so far? For me, I’m keeping up well with my Korean lessons and also trying to take less stress about my semester exams.
What are your goals for 2024? Let’s chat in the comment section!
See you!
Poorwa's blog 
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