Life updates are one of my favorite kinds of posts – both to read and to write. These are the kind of posts that set the writer free to write it all, whatever they want, and you don’t even have to worry about going off topic, if you know what I mean. One moment I’d be writing about my daily routine and the next I would be telling you about this acquaintance who was getting on my nerves the other day. So since I haven’t done any such posts in a while, here I am!
I’m unusually happy as I’m writing this post and seriously, I don’t know why. I mean, it’s definitely not a bad thing at all; I don’t have a right to complain about feeling happy, do I? But you know, especially since I’ve turned 18, I’ve been having too many thoughts about literally everything. All the time my mind is throwing “why” and “how” questions at me.
Just an hour ago, I was smacking my head because of a topic I was getting stuck on while I was trying to study. My 4th sem finals start on 14, so there’s obviously not much time left and the funny thing is that I’m not even stressing about it the way I usually do. Uni life has done some magic to me. Especially this semester system, it feels like we have an exam every other month so even the fear is not working on me properly.
One great thing I’ve learned in these past two years is to accept things as they are. Your school friends don’t care about you anymore – accept it (move on, make new friends), you’re not that good at everything you thought you were – accept it (it’s okay), someone else might get higher marks than you – accept it (they’re working as hard as you), and what else… they throw bricks at you – accept it (build a castle out of it lol). That’s it. Regrets of the past and worries of the future are not leaving us alone anytime soon, I know it, we know it, but at least we can try and live in the moment a little.
I read this quote somewhere – “The way you live your days is how you live your life.” And I could swear this quote hit me both mentally and physically. I spent most of this summer wasting my time in procrastinating or sleeping. I don’t hate myself for it but still, I know I should’ve tried better. I’m not great at keeping promises, especially the ones I make to myself… but now, I’m starting to realize how important it is to stand true to yourself, to your words. Because at the end of the day, I don’t wanna be someone I can’t believe.
So that’s something that is motivating me nowadays to not waste my days anymore. The main point is that I don’t necessarily have to do something big to make a day significant. For me, it starts with the little things. Helping mom a little more with the chores, organizing my room, studying with focus and taking short breaks in between, babysitting my cousin’s daughter, giving my pets the attention they deserve and creating a playlist… yeah, things like these that make me sometimes tired maybe, but definitely make me feel better.
I wrote the first half of this post yesterday and made a note to self that I have to schedule it tomorrow. And here I am! I live for small wins like this, when I win a challenge I gave to myself. Back then I wouldn’t really notice such things, but now this change is overwhelming. Realizing – This is Life. I never really had to wait for it to start, it had always been there, maybe I was just expecting for some miracle to happen… but the biggest miracle of all was, is, life. The fact that we are here right now.
P.S.- Yesterday we got our revised timetable for the exams and now it’s starting from 21st! I’m both happy and sad about that. Happy because I can celebrate Rakshabandhan peacefully that’s on 19, and sad because I wanted to get done with these exams as soon as possible. But nevermind…
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